Roast Beef is barbecuing!

Which is great because Gramma K (a) doesn't like to go outside, and (b) won't eat barbecued food because in her eyes it is highly carcinogenic. Although she did go outside for a bit today, to go to church at her friend's house (I don't know if you'd call it a friend, because I don't think she can have friends, and I don't know if you'd exactly call it church, because it's someone's house, but those are the words she uses). I guess they just sit around and complain about their joints and read a bit of Bible. Anyhow, earlier today while she was out we fooled around with the new machine Beef built for me - it's awesome. He tricked out the chipset drivers and fine-tuned FreeBSD so this thing basically flies. Listen to me, all saying "basically" - I'm starting to talk like him!

ROAST BEEF: So uh basically we gonna have us some bbq today I mean uh basically this evening
ME: Cool, basically.

He's making hot dogs ("my speciality" he says) so we minced some onions and got some peppers and tomatoes so we could make them just like Chicago dogs. He's really big on hot dogs being thematic. Last time he cooked them they were "sadness dogs" because he had gotten over his Yahoo! Mail quota and lost an eBay bid. Sadness dogs are just plain hot dogs with two eye dots and a frown, made out of mustard, at one of the ends. He drew a ketchup tie on his because he had been wearing his tie at the time. He's so cute. Ok, he just called me that they're ready - I'm gonna jump out the window rather than go through the house.