Worried about Beef

I think Beef's been getting high too often during the day. Just now I came home from my afternoon shift at Applebee's (I'll explain later) and he was standing silently in the kitchen, pretending to prepare food. He had pans on the burners, an empty butter dish on the counter, and a couple whisks and spoons set out next to the stove. He even had an apron on. I snuck past him and am just goofing around online until he finishes whatever he thinks he's doing and asks if we can order Domino's.